Ridiculous Things I Want

While there aren't any formal plans in place for it yet, I'm fairly sure that when our wedding reception ends at 11 PM, there will be an after-party at a nearby bar. My thinking is that Mr. O and I would definitely like to attend the after-party and keep the good times rolling with our friends and family (we have the rest of our lives to gaze dreamily into each other's eyes in private, right?).

My wedding dress is reasonably comfortable, by which I mean it probably won't have killed me by the end of the night. I plan to wear it throughout the reception, but for the after-party? Hells nah. I will want that sucker OFF by then. So, now I have become enamored of the idea of having an after-party dress. This after-party dress.





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You guys. This dress is ivory. Being an ivory-colored person, I never wear ivory. It is also completely covered in sequins. I do not ever wear anything covered in sequins. It is a totally over-the-top, one-wear, fancy, ridiculous, not-really-me, 138-dollar dress. And I WANNTTTTT ITTTTT. Because, look, I'm going to be wearing fake eyelashes and a very large hair accessory made of feathers and crystals and netting, and it's my wedding day. WHEN ELSE in my entire life can I sport a crazy, sparkly, sequined white dress and feel good about it? It's my wedding day, and I will dress like a showgirl if I want to.

I will probably not buy this dress. Probably. It's silly to buy another dress for my wedding day that I will never wear again. I mean, right?.......oooooh, sequins. But probably not.

While we're playing the Veruca Salt "I want, I want, give it to me nowwwww" game, though, you know what else occurred to me would be fun to have?

A really silly and decadent bathrobe to wear while getting my hair and makeup done in the morning. If I could be more specific, a SATIN KIMONO! (Just typing the words "satin kimono" made me laugh out loud. It sounds so aging-diva.)


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Or maybe a really plushy white bathrobe that says BRIDE on the back in RHINESTONES! This is a fun game. For the record, I also want a photo booth, chivari chairs, upgraded linens, a gigantic dessert table, ginormous floral centerpieces, and a late-night snack of Primanti Bros sandwiches brought into the reception. And that honeymoon to Japan and Thailand I originally envisioned. And a second honeymoon to France and Italy. Also, another French bulldog, although that's not wedding-related.


LOOK HOW CUTE SHE IS! Now imagine how cute it would be if I had TWO of these!

Your turn. What ridiculous, impractical, won't-happen-but-wouldn't-it-be-fun items do YOU have on your mind?